l haven't blogged in a long time, not once during my pregnancy with Abby. So here is her birth story.
On Thursday the 13th February I was 36 weeks and 5 days pregnant, we went for our weekly scan. We knew this appointment was the decider, she had been breech since 28 weeks. We had fought with the choice of ecv (to manually turn her) or section. I had spent 3 weeks doing all sorts to turn her but she wasn't for turning. Ecv has it's risks, I flitted back and fourth, I wanted another natural labour, I had done the other two so well.
So we went for our scan, at this point I'd been having weekly scans since 32 weeks as fluid was low and Abbys growth had slowed. I was having a ctg twice a week too. During the scan the sonographer checked my notes, I knew it wasn't good. Looking back Iassume she thought she made a mistake with measurements since there was no change. We waited on her doing the report then saw our consultant, he was waiting, that is never good. We sat down and he just got to it, 'the baby needs to come out and I'm afraid it needs to be a section'. I cried. He explained there was no growth in two weeks, she was small and fluid was low, no good would come of leaving her inside. I asked if our baby would die, he said probably not, but if he left me to have a natural labour we would be high risk for a still birth. We assumed it would be the following week as thr only do elective sections on a Tuesday and Thursday. He went away to see about booking me in, came back and said Sunday. We were shocked, but obviously that's how important it was she come out. I was given steroids there and then and another shot on Friday after my ctg. Another ctg Saturday and paperwork for the section.
Andys brother and his girlfriend came down to watch Ruby on the Sunday. I cried leaving her, I'd never left her longer than a few hours. It was 8am and I knew I wouldn't see her for 12 hours. We went to the hospital, checked in and got ready. We waited, what seemed like forever. Our friend and midwife Lynn came in for us and I'm so glad she was there. There was an emergency section that went in before me and at around 11am Andy and I were walking along holding hands on the way to meet our baby. I gave him a kiss knowing or lives were about to change. I went through and he went to get scrubs on, which he was very excited about.
I instantly cried, I sat on the table sobbing as Lynn tried to calm me. I begged her not to let my baby die, it was just 8 days after Angus 3rd birthday, 5 days after the day he died and 2 daysnafter his due date. We planned this pregnancy to avoid these dates, yet here we were moments from meeting our 3rd baby in 3 years. We didn't know what state she would be in when she came out, the resuscitation trolly was set up. They has estimated her weight at 2kg (4.4lb) and I honestly thought she may not make it. This was the moment our lives would change, would we have more live babies than dead babies?
They got the drip in, and started doing the spinal it wasnt sore just felt weird. I lay down and my legs started to tingle. They tested if I could lift them, if I could feel the cold spray. I was numb up to my nipples! They put a big screen up, that's all I could see, Andy then came in looking handsome in his scrubs. I was told they had started, Andy held my hand and I felt calm but I felt scared. Waiting what seemed a life time the dr said 'one leg out' she was breech, we knew that. Other leg and bum followed then her head. It seemed like forever till she cried but she did. It was a girl! Ruby had wanted to call her Abby (Sesame St) and we gave her Victoria after my friend Vicki. She got shown to Andy then taken away to be checked, she let out the odd cry and I prayed she was ok. I cried, they brought her over and I held her. The dr said he wanted to take her to neonatal as a precaution. 5lb 2oz, bigger than they thought and she looked like Ruby. They took her and I cried, it seemed so wrong. With Angus and Ruby the first hands on them were mine, I guided them out and put them to my chest. Poor Abby was yanked out head last by a stranger then taken from me. I went into recovery, lynn got Abby back with a bit of a fight. She came through in a cot, dressed in pink! Someone else had put her first nappy on, her first outfit wasn't the one I had picked. It broke my heart but we had skin to skin for 2 hours as I fed her. I was due to go back to the ward but neonatal wouldn't let me take Abby. Babies under 2.4kg (she was 2.3) needed blood sugars checked every 4 hours. I begged them to do it on the ward but the dr said no. So I went back, empty handed neither of my girls with me, broken.
I sent Andy home for lunch and to check Ruby. I was all alone, I had some tea amd toast and let my friends know. I watched the clock, waiting. It was nearly 2 hours till she came back. They brought her round in a hot cot, as she was small they were concerned she couldn't regulate her temperature. I held her and covered us bith in blankets, hot cot pah! Mama was all she needed. We snuggled and fed and I took in every detail of her. This little girl dressed in pink (much to my disgust!) She was beautiful she was ours. I had put all wants and fears aside and did what any mother would to ensure a live baby. It hsd turned out good, I was sore but happy. Ruby came to visit after dinner, she was so happy, her face lit up.
The next 24 hours were a blur of feeding, keeping her warm and ensuring her blood sugars didn't drop. We got home on Tuesday morning after she only lost 4oz, it felt amazing to start life with my rainbow girls. It wasn't how we planned but clearly Abby needed to take the less stressful route out. She is thriving and settled in well.
